Friday, April 30, 2010

Don't Count Me Out

I am a lover of the arts! The arts help us express our emotions, feelings and it can let a person into what we are going through in a particular season of our lives. I especially love songs written by the people who performing them. The add such a power to them when the person knows the love, joy, pain, hurt and struggle of the lyrics they are singing. With that being said, I do believe songs written for other people can be sung with power.

A poet on open mic night performing one of there pieces, it can be something of beauty to watch them, their facial expressions, the hand movement and the delivery of the piece. The dancer taking an original piece of choreography and presenting it for the first time, you can see the energy, love and care it took the dancer to put every movement together.

The arts in of itself can be a very challenging field to pursue as a career. Many put all they have into their particular craft and some die still pursuing their dreams. History has shown many artists especially painters were not acknowledged for their brilliance until after their deaths. I wonder to myself at times do I have it in me to pursue this writing career with the same passion many before me have exhibit. In honest I must admit there are times when I question my own passion and talent. I am a microwave baby I want everything done in two minutes with as little effort as possible. However, this self-proclaim microwave baby is being taught a very valuable lesson by God. He is teaching me the talents and gifts, He has given me needs to be nurtured. Other lessons I am learning are humility and anything you want to accomplish in this world you have to work for it and earn it.

I think about the labor of love many writers, painters, dancers, actors, screenwriters, poets, sings and musicians put into their crafts. I sometimes find myself wondering and asking God, “is this worthy it.” Do I continue to pursue this writing career or just give up and settle into a nice job somewhere for the next 30 years then enjoy my retirement? It is in these moments God sends me to Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” So, I continue to write, pray and know the plans God has for my life will manifest in His timing.

The last sentence can sometimes be hard, very hard to do. The waiting process is not the easiest process to go through. As I get ready to release my first book entitled From the Gutters to a Mansion: My Journey to my Heavenly Father, I have an excitement and joy, knowing the LORD is working His plan for my life.

Marvin Sapp has a couple of songs on his new CD that just have been ministering to me. I believe God instructed him to release these songs just for me. (I am crazy enough to believe it, you guys) Songs like Don’t Count Me Out, His Hands Are On You, Comfort Zone, Here I Am and The Best In Me. It is like they scream Jeremiah 29:11 and say Ryane stay focus on God’s plan! I listen to these songs just about everyday. I find my encouragement to continue to write and pursue the plans God has for my life. The writing career, the work God has just for Ryane Belynda Nickens and all the other promises God has made to me.

I especially love Don’t Count Me Out. The lyrics say:

Left alone but never forgotten*
Misunderstood but my future is just starting
God is molding me and making me
He's building me and shaping me
A king {Queen} is being formed right in front of your eyes
So don't count me out


So don't count me out
When you don't see what He sees
You can't tell but His glory is resting on me
I'm His choice
I'm after his heart
The unveiling is starting now

To all those who God has gifted with a specific talent or promise, I encourage you to continue to do what God has put on your heart. Continue to work the plan God has given you, in due season, if you do not give up, you will most certainly reap a harvest for your time spent sowing in whatever God has you doing. I am going to borrow my Pastor Sermon title from this past Sunday, which was “Never Give Up On God Because God Will Never Give Up On You.”

Thursday, April 22, 2010

A Call To Love

As I look at the news and read the news websites, my heart often weeps for our world. You hear so much about the hate and violence that has claimed so many lives across the world that it makes you sick to your stomach. I find myself sometimes asking God, why is this happening. How could someone hurt a sweet innocent baby? How could you hate a whole race or culture you do not know? Is it really that easy to step on a plane, train or shopping center and blow up innocent people? Is it that easy to take a gun and gunned down innocent people because you feel like life has hand you a bad deal?

These are some of the questions I present to God when I hear about things like the mass shooting here in Washington, DC that took the lives of five young people or the death and rape of another child at the hands of a child molester. I sit back and think, “Where are we as a group of people that we do not love and respect each other?” Did we loss our humanity or did we never fully have it to begin with?

I know many Christians say, we are not supposed to question God that is a huge no no. My question to them is how do I get answers from God if I did not present my questions to Him. I look at many of the prophets in Bible times who asked God questions about specific things. The prophet Habakkuk had questions He presented to God and they were answered. So, I believe I can present my question before an All-Knowing God and get answers also.

When go before the LORD with these questions, two words are brought to my mind and spirit forgiveness and love. I was talking to my sister a couple of weeks ago about forgiveness, she told me when you have been hurt to the degree she has, forgiving is a very hard thing to do. I shared with her how freeing it can be to forgive those who have hurt you because the forgiveness is not truly for them but for you. I tried to explain to her when un-forgiveness is left uncheck it holds you in bondage to your emotional and to people. God does not want us in bondage. In His Word it says, who the Son sets free is free indeed. (John 8:36) She continued to talk about all the reason she could not forgive the people who had hurt her. I told her you have to deal with the problems head on and talk to God about them and the people who have wronged you, you have to make peace with these situations or they will kill you emotionally and physically, our conversation end with her hanging up on me then not picking up her telephone when I called her back.

I share this conversation I had with my sister because we have to get to a place of forgiveness. I know it is hard, it was hard for me to forgive the man who molested me, it was heard to forgive the people who take the lives of my love ones, and it was hard for me to forgive myself for having an abortion but I had too. I had to forgive because it was the only I could truly love. The only way I could truly love myself, my family, my friends and my neighbor.

Take all your pain, anger, frustration and hurt to God. Tell Him all about it, then when God opens an opportunity talk with the person who hurt you about the situation that caused the pain. When you deal with the situation you will find yourself at that place of forgiveness and letting go.

Forgiveness opens you up to love and “love covers over a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8)

I believe God is calling us into prayer for our family, friends, neighbors, elected officials and this world. It is a call to the body of Christ to pray and go out and tell a dying world about a Savior who looks beyond our faults to our needs. I know there are some pure evil people out here but I also believe some people have let life experiences turn their hearts cold. There is a saying, “hurt people, hurt people.”

I love the fact God sent me to a Bible teaching and believing church. My Pastor in his sermon this pass Sunday encouraged us to continue the work of Jesus Christ and go out evangelize and disciple folks. This is what Jesus Christ’s earthly ministry was about bringing people to the Father, healing them from the hurt, suffering and pain.

So, when I present my questions before God about the ills of this world. His answer to me is pray, show my love, and telling the people about a God who is able to heal their brokenness.

For the greatest commandment is to 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' (Matthew 22:36-39)

Thursday, April 15, 2010

The Waiting Process

On Monday morning I found myself sitting in my apartment in tears, feeling like the many trials I am facing was just going to consume me at that point. I sat, cried and talking with my God. I asked Him why so much pain in my life? From my teenagers years upward I have known pain intimately. It seem at times that pain would always be apart of my life.

As I sat Monday morning my soul was crying out to my heavenly Father, how much longer will I have endure pain and lack. I tried to distract myself by getting on facebook but there was no running from this thing. I got on and saw my mentor was online, so I asked her to pray for me, telling her I was just feeling so down. So, she said, “lets go for a ride.” God knows just want you need when you need it.

While I was getting ready, God begin to minister to me; reminding me, my timing and His timing are two different things. Then one of my favorite songs came to me, reminding me God can be trusted. I love Faithful Is Our God by Hezekiah Walker, the lyrics say, “Faithful, faithful, faithful is our God; I'm reaping the harvest God promised me; Taking back what the devil stole from me; And I rejoice today, for I shall recover it all; Yes, I rejoice today, for I shall recover it all. I truly believe I will reap the harvest God has promised. It’s just sometimes the waiting process can truly be a hard one.

I was reminded of what David said in Psalm 37:7, “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.” As I thought about folks who were not following the LORD and not trying to walk in the plans He has for their lives. I thought how prosperous it seems they are, how it is not a struggle for them to get their books published, their finances in order and working the plans they have for their lives.

I must say God did a lot of reminding me of things on Monday. He reminded me I was living for an eternal glory and not just things or to be popular. He reminded me things would not always be easy. That He was my Provider, my Shield, my Refuge and everything I need could be find in Him. I was reminded that God’s blessings come with no curses.

As the LORD took me through His Word, I realized, He had dropped these scriptures into my spirit weeks ago. Like Number 23:19, “God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?” and Psalm 23:1 “The LORD is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want.

Sometimes I (we) need to be reminded that God is not a man that He should lie. That He is faithful to keep His promises to us. I (we) also need to realize God is not on my (our) schedule. He may not arrive at the time and place I (we) want Him too but He will arrive at the time and place He has scheduled in His book of life. The book that has everyday of my life in it!

I spent the rest of the day with my mentor talking things out and listening. She reminded me, “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Philippians 1:6

So, I encouraged myself with the Word of God knowing “weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.” Psalm 30:5 I had to also remind myself of what Paul said in Galatians 6:9, Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

And as for you, brothers, never tire of doing what is right. 2 Thessalonians 3:13

Thursday, April 1, 2010

LORD Is My Shepherd

Last night as I lay in bed trying to get to sleep, Psalm 23:1 came to my thoughts. It says, “The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.” After I read it I just continue to repeat it, then the need to read Isaiah 55 came. Then I was lead to Matthew 6: 25-34, it was during this reading I begin to think back to a 3:00 a.m. wake up call from the LORD back in July of 2009. The LORD had wake me up and lead me through Deuteronomy 28, Psalm 23, Isaiah 55, Matthew 6:25-34 and ending with Hebrews 11:1.

This was the order I read the scripture in that earlier morning back in July of 2009. But last night the LORD started with Psalm 23:1, I now understanding why, as I sit here writing this blog post, I know God started with Psalm 23:1 because I had to believe and trust in Psalm 23:1 to full grasp what He was trying to get to me in the rest of the scriptures.

See, after the LORD lead me through the scripture back in July, He said, “the doors of Heaven are open ask for what ever you want and it will be given to you.” One of the things I asked for was salvation for my family. This week I found myself before the LORD daily praying and praising Him for my family salvation. I have been feeling like something miraculous is about to occur. I can not really put in words this feeling I have had all week long. It’s like a kid on Christmas Eve, knowing that his/her parents got them just what they asked for but they have to wait to get the gifts. That excitement has been so overwhelming in me this week, knowing God is on the verge of doing some wonderful things in the life of my family. I am that kid on Christmas Eve just wanting to un-wrap the gifts but knowing I have to wait for the Father.

I am patiently waiting, working, praying and praising God during this time for I know the storm clouds are rescinding and the peace of the LORD is coming over my family. The faith I have in God has been tested to say the least these last three years. In the last three years I have wanted to walk away, I have been depressed, I have felt like no one understand what I was going through, discouragement was at a all time high, the call the LORD has placed on my life was in doubt, and the promising God had made me were in doubt. But thanks be to an awesome God, who provides sustaining grace and He has taught me that I can have peace in the midst of my storm. He has taught me through experiences with Him, I can trust Him no matter what with everything concerning me. Cause He will never leave me nor forsake me. He will lead me through the valley of the shadow of death and no harm will come to me. For He is my Father and He is my peace!

I am at a place where I can say, “What you (enemy) meant for evil, God is working it out for my good.” During the last three years my relationship with Christ has deepened, my resolve to work the plan He has for my life has only intensified, my prayer life is better then ever, and my faith and trust in God to be my every thing is stronger than ever and growing. I know for sure He is my Healer, Deliverer, Provider, Comforter and my Peace!

I can’t help but to look back over my life, my life apart from God and my life with God. I am so thankful for all He has done. The other night I was talking to my sister and she said, “Ryane you are strong.” This has been something I heard the LORD saying over the last three years, you are stronger then what you think you are. Father, I hear you and I know it is because of Your love and sustaining grace that I am. It is that same sustaining grace I know is available to my family.
As I wait and watch the LORD fulfill His promises, I rejoice knowing He can always be trusted. Knowing that The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.