A Cause for Celebration

Alright, so it is birthday week for me and those of you who know me, know I love to celebrate my birthday beyond the day I was born. This is one of those milestone years for me I will be 30 years old on Saturday September 27. At my church when God is allowing a big event to take place and the joy on the inside just needs to come out, we just simply say, I’m SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED, so that is where I found myself five days before my 30th birthday, SO EXCITED!!!

I know this is probably hard for some who struggle with this whole turning 30 businesses, but for me it is an accomplishment. Some of you may be wondering why I consider turning 30 a accomplishment, well, after my sister was killed I became severely depressed which led to suicidal thoughts and attempts. For most of my teenager and early adult years I lived in a depressive state. See, for me life and death was an everyday decision I had to make, was I going to given into the trials and pressures of life or was I going to try once more to live just one more day. This was the decision I had to make for almost ten years of my life until one day there was a knock on the door of my heart and the Lord said, “Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. Ryane do you hear my voice and will you open the door, So, I can come in and eat with you and you with me.”(Paraphrased) Revelations 3:20.

So, now when I hear songs like Marvin Sapp’s Never Would Have Made It, I smile because I know I am here, not because of anything I did but because of His grace and mercy. Mississippi Mass Choir has a song called Grace and Mercy, the song says, “Your grace and mercy brought me through, I am living this moment because of you.” The song goes on to say, “I want to thank you and praise you too because Your grace and mercy brought me through.” If you are like me and you know it is because of God’s grace and His mercy that you are better than you were, just thank Him right now.

For those who do not know about His grace and mercy, I dare you to try Him for yourself. If you have tried alcohol, sex, drugs and anything else to ease the pain with no results, how about trying Jesus. He can heal your brokenness in ways you could not begin to comprehend. I answered His call in earnest in August of 2005, since then my Heavenly Father has been taking care of His baby girl. I took Him at His Word and begin “being transformed by the renewing of my mind. Then I was able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” (Paraphrased) Romans 12:2. So, no longer is suicidal a thought, no longer am I ruled by bitterness, anger, fornication, alcohol, revenge, and destruction. I am living the life God promised me, taking back what the devil steal from me. And I am rejoicing today, for I am about to recovery it all. How do I know that I will recovery it all, my Heavenly Father tells me, “He will repay me for the years the locusts have stolen.” (Paraphrased) Joel 2: 25a.

So, as my 30th birthday approaches, I found myself at peace with life, knowing my best days are ahead of me. The LORD will bless the latter part of my life more than the former part. (Paraphrased) Job 42:12. As, I march on to the day in which my life begin on this earth I do so with gladness and a joy within me. A joy I know came from the God of my salvation, the One who called me out of the darkness into the marvelous light to be a living testimony to His goodness, mercy, grace and abounding love. The beautiful thing I have learned about God is when He answers our prayers, He sometimes gives us more than we prayed for and sometimes He gives us stuff we never asked Him for. So, as I continue to seek Him I know I have only begun to see His promises and blessings upon my life.

But there was a time I use to ask God would I ever be happy or would I ever have peace in my life. He has answered those questions and to be quite honest, God has done me one better, He has given me joy deep down on the inside and He has given me His peace. See happiness is a situational thing but joy is something totally different. The www.studylight.org website describes joy as the fruit of a right relation with God. It is not something people can create by their own efforts. We can create our own happiness but joy is something we get from our Heavenly Father. I thank Him for the joy He has imparted to me!

As I begin to reflect and celebrate the day I was born into this world, I look back with gratitude and a grateful heart. I am grateful to the Lord, for not only saving me but for keeping me, delivering me, and for loving me past life’s pains. I found myself smiling more than I have in the past, with a song of praise on my lips all the time, and a determination to continue to grow in the Lord.

And you know what, I feel like singing, Never would have made it, never could have made it, without You, I would have lost it all, but now I see how You were there for me; And I can say; Never would have made it, Never could have made it, Without You. When I look back over all You brought me thru. I can see that You were the one that I held on to; Oh I would have lost it all, oh but now I see how You were there for me; would have made it, never could have made it, without You; I would have lost my mind a long time ago, if it had not been for you. I am stronger; I am wiser; I am better; So much better; I made it thru my storm and my test because You were there to carry me thru my mess.

Thank you all and have a blessed week.