Why I Believe

I have never really felt the desire to validate my faith in God to anyone. I have never much cared to answer the critic who asked, “how can I believe in someone or something I have never seen.” So today in this edition of A Bab for Christ, I will not attempt to validate my faith but I would like to share my reasons for my faith in God.

I am reminded of Langston Hughes poem Mother to Son, the lines “Life for me ain't been no crystal stair. It's had tacks in it, And splinters, And boards torn up, And places with no carpet on the floor -- Bare. But all the time I'se been a-climbin' on, And reachin' landin's, And turnin' corners, And sometimes goin' in the dark Where there ain't been no light.” Well, this journey of faith God has called me to and my 30 years of existence has not been a crystal stair, it has indeed has some splinters, some bare days and I have seen my fair share of dark days, where it was hard for me to see the light.

In the midst of the heartache I suffered it was hard for me to look to God, as so many people told me too. Especially, after the day my sister was killed and my mom, brother and sister were shot. There was nothing in me that believed a loving God would allow something so terrible to happen to me and my family. I had all these questions and no answers from the God everyone kept telling me to turn too.

Then one day I was tired of the pity parties. I was tired of being tired. I was tired of not having anything to live for and not have anything to stand on. It was then in a small office on the campus of North Carolina Central University in the English Department as I sat amongst friends and classmates that I thought about the God my Grandmothers worshipped, the God my mother often called upon and the God my friends often talked about. It was in that office after months of struggling with my choice to abort my baby that I wanted to know if their God could help me. If He would give me the peace and joy that had eluded me for so many years of my life?

Let me explain, I knew of God, we even had causal conversation from time to time but I did not know Him like a child knows their father. You see to know God is to know His Word and I had no clue about His Word. I did not know I could find strength in His Word. I was always told to trust Him and He would work it out but no one really give me scriptures to support what they were saying. It was not until I answered the call of God that I started to understand what Jesus said in John 16:33b, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. ” I did not know His said, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. (2 Corinthian 12:9)"

These were among the very first verse of His Word that God had me committed to memory and to my spirit. I recall early on in this journey with God I would ask Him to hold me because I heard and read He was a comforter. It would be in those times I would have the most peaceful rest I ever had. God would and still does provided me with a scripture for particular situation in my life. He also gives me songs that speak to me and encourage me to continue on. I know Mary Mary songs “Yesterday” and “Can’t Give Up Now” helped me through the first two years of my journey with God.

I like the Samaritan woman at the well in the book of John, met a man (Jesus) who told me all about myself. He not only told me about the hurt I had experienced in my life. But He told me about the future I could and would have with Him as my Lord and Savior. He said He could and would exchange my hurt for love, my pain for peace, my weeping with dancing, my tears with joy and my bitterness for hope.

Jesus told me in Matthew 11: 28-30, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Yes, I can testify, His yoke is easy and His burden is indeed light. The problems of life have not ceased in my life, the way I deal with them has. That is too trust God with everything concerning me.

The reason I believe in God is simple, “I love Him because He first loved me. paraphrase (1 John 4:19)” It is in His love and Word that I have found myself and my purpose for this life I have. I believe because He thought about my when He sent His son to die on the cross for my sins. I believe because in August 2005 I went before Him broken and hopeless. But to God be the Glory in February 2009 I no longer see myself as damaged goods. I see myself as God sees me, fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14) that is why I know His works are wonderful because I am His works.

I believe because I see the difference God has made in my life.

I Trust You

God will make a way. How many people truly believe that statement beyond a shadow of a doubt? Last week in Bible Study my Pastor asked us this question, “How much do we really trust God?” Do we really trust God with everything concerning us? As I looked back over my life, especially the last four years since I have been on a committed faith journey with the Father. Had I really trusted God with everything concerning me? I had to be honest with myself. I had not trusted the One who is able to work everything out for me according to His perfect will.

I bring this up because one of my best friends is going through an extremely hard time right now. We had a 3 in a half hour conversation the other day in which at some point, I got frustrated with her. I posed this question to her, “Can God do anything?” She responded yes but…it was in the “but” that I was most frustrated with. If you sincerely believe God can do anything then there are no buts. That night I had my Tuesday night Bible Study class and the lesson was on “praying powerfully”. I shared with the class my frustrating with my friend’s faith in God but it was the saints who reminded me of how little faith I had in God when I started on the journey with Him. As the teacher wrote the word intercessor on the board, I felt convicted in my spirit. You see an intercessor is one who prays or petition God on behalf of another. I had prayed for me friend on many occasions but in that moment God told me what to pray for on her behalf.

As for my frustrated with her…I remembered how little my faith was in the beginning of my walk with Christ. I did not do as Hebrews 4:16 instructed us to do, “Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Jesus the Savior said in Matthew 17:20, “if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you." According to Wikipedia a mustard seed is about 2 mm in diameter. Just take a second to think about that…Jesus did not say we needed faith the size of the state of California or the continent of Africa to move the mountains in our lives but the size of a tiny mustard seed. How awesome is the Father?

So I took my frustrating with my friend’s faith to prayer, asking the Father to keep her during this stormy time in her life. God said in Matthew 11:30, “For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." He even went further in 1 Peter 5:7 and said we can “cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” Jesus said in John 14:14, “You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.” So, I also asked God to strengthen her in His Word because the Word of God brings life to a dying spirit. His Word is encouraging to those who are losing hope. His Word is encouraging to us who believe in Him to continue to fight the good fight knowing the One who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light (1 Peter 2:9c), is able to keep and sustain us through all things.

As for my Pastor’s question, “how much do you really trust God?” Over the last four years I have grown to trust God with everything concerning me and my family. I trust Him to heal and strengthen my grandmother who has breast cancer, I also trust Him to give my aunts, uncles and dad strength as they help their mom with the day to day activities of life she can no longer really do on her own. I trust God to heal my cousin from her illness. I trust God to heal my aunt of her illness. I call Him Jehovah Rapha which means the Lord that heals. Jesus said in Mark 11:24, “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.” I believe they will be healed according to God’s will for their lives. I believe the book deal I have been searching for is coming. I believe the man God has for me is coming. I believe the restoration of my family is being worked out accord to God’s perfect plan. I believe God is working all things out for my God. I thank Him for the storms of life because it is in my storms that I have come to know Him best.

There is a song I love by James Fortune called “I Trust You”. The lyric are “so many painful thoughts travel through my mind and I wonder how I will make it through this time. but I trust you lord it’s not easy sometimes the pain in my life makes you seem far away but I’ll trust you I need to know you’re here through the tears and the pain through the heartache and rain. I’ll trust you! Everything that I see tells me not to believe but I’ll trust you lord you have never failed me my past still controls me will this hurt ever leave?
I can only trust you no one else like you do


God I trust You!!!!