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One of my facebook friends posted a status this morning asking, “Was God ever really lost.” In response too so many people saying they find Him. In the book of Revelation, Jesus says, “Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.”
With that scripture in mind I do not believe God was ever lost but that we were lost. In His infinite love for us God sought us out so that we could be reconciled back to Him. The evidence of His love for us is so clear in the life, death and resurrection of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
Looking back over my life and when I heard the Lord knocking on the doors of my heart back in 2004, I begin to think about a better life, one free from the pain and anger that was so apparent in my life since I was 15 years old. So many people had come in my life from that point, who talked about the goodness of the Lord. I never really thought a good God would allow me to go through so much heartache and pain. I held on to a lingering notion that God really could not love me or mean me any good with all life had shown me at such an early age. So for years I went through life feeling a hurt and void no one could fill. Until one day back in 2004 I noticed a yearning in me to be truly free from hurt and pain. Thinking back I now know it was God gently leading me to Him.
See in the midst of my pain and hurt God begin to reveal Himself to me. He begin to tell me drinking, sex and all the other ways I was self-medicating to deal with the pain was truly not the answer to dealing with my pain. He told me, “II have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” When I wrapped my mind around the fact God said there will be trouble in my life but that He had dealt with it, my heart begin to open to Him more. In August of 2005, I heard the LORD clearly saying now is the time for you to come on this journey with me and I will heal your broke heart and every broke thing in your life.
As I enter year five of my journey with God, I am so glad He found me. I am so overjoyed that I continue each day to discovery her mercy, grace and joy each day. I know and believe that “surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever!
Thank you God for finding me and loving me enough to come looking for me even when I was not looking for you! Thank you for being the light of my salvation and my bright and morning star, the joy of my strength I have find in You and Your Word. I am so much better since you find me and delivered me from my pit.
2 comments:
Isn't that so true. All of us have within us a void that can only be filled by God. He created us that way. He created us to have fellowship with Him and to worship Him, yet He gives us free will to decide if we want that fellowship. He doesn't knock down the door of our heart, he, like the gentleman He is, gently knocks on that door, waiting on the other side for our response -- either to let Him in -- or slam it close as an indication we don't want Him in our life. If the latter is the choice, that is a terrible choice to make. We will search our whole life through trying to fill that void with other people, things and even our own self-inflated egos but will never find true love, peace and happiness.
I am glad He found me. I am glad He reached down to me while I was in my mess and drew me to Himself. Oh what love! Ever since that day, I have held as one of my favorite scriptures, Psalm 42:1 and I quote: "As the hart panteth after the water brooks,
so panteth my soul after thee, O God." This is what happens when we let Him fill that void .. our soul just longs for more fellowship, more worship, more of Him in our lives. You are so right, we don't find Him, He finds us when we come to Him as empty vessels wanting that void filled with His presence. What love, what relationship. Wouldn't trade it for nothing in the world.
WOW Ryane you said a mouthful to hear his call and to heed to it is someting I struggle with daily he has definitely been there forever and he knew us before we were even born predestined to be his children!! I am now in a purging state he has layed me on my face and teaching me a true lesson about sex and he had too do it the hard way... BUT HE LOVES US SO MUCH HE WONT LET US PARISH AND I JUST WANT TO ENCOURAGE YOU TO CONTINYE BEING ABOUT OUR FATHERS BUSINESS I AM IN TEARS BEAUTIFUL!
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